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Sunday school disaster! I have always known and admitted that I am not good with kids, but that was when I did not even try to work with them in the first place. After some time with them, I am starting to discover a new side of my personality which is quite good with dealing with kids. By kids I mean age 0-10, because they are the ones who attend our english mass Sunday school every week. But today was different, today was my first experience of frustration and possible resignation. I always took things as challenging, and quiting was never in my vocabulary, but today I felt so useless that I almost gave up. It is true that no matter how long you study children psychology and method of teaching, you can never say you have seen it all until you start working with actual kids. This kid started seeking attention which I gave at first but later became violent when I started telling him to behave. He started banging his head on my stomach, started clinging to my legs and punching me. When my instincts told me that this childis problematic and that he is an attention seeker, my first reaction was to withdraw the stimulant which is attention giving. But again the child did not stop and the more he did his thing, the more I can not but attend to him. Finally I asked the other teachers if he was doing it everytime, the answer was negative, so I concluded that probably since I was a new face and that I initiallygave him attention then probably I can be a vulnerable victim. I asked them if its ok to let him out of the room, and they said yes, but I had to accompany him. I tried my best in talking with him, trying to persuade him, I even prayed to the Holy Spirit to help me, but to no avail the child was stern not to be moved. It was either him or me, so I let him be and tried to leave him, but watching over him. All those years of Philosophy, Theology, and Counseling all put to waste by a single case of this trouble child.

Tonight, as I reflect on the events today I realized one thing, that good intentions are not always enough. Applying what we know for the good of those to whom we minister is not as simple as data transfer. We have to have the ability to handle people and be humble enough to admit our limitations. I am planning to ask help from professional nursery and elementary teachers to help. If there are SPED or special education teachers, then much better. I saw a foe in the child, an enemy that had to be won over, but the result was a disaster. I should have treated him with care and respect, one that a father or a mother would give to a fragile and crying child. My being a counselor who studied a little bit of psychology took over when in fact I should have been a deacon, a religious brother who could have been more patient and compationate, taking the child as Christ would have done, not restraining them but rather inviting them to him. I am not yet ready in this kind of ministry, but I hope I don't loose heart in trying my best to reflect Jesus who specially loved the small ones.